This is all...

www.stoprhinopoaching.com

Chivalry...

Just got back from my cuzzie's wedding.
I'm so exhausted! From the little bit of dancing I did... from all the driving... and defenitely from all that eating. There was so much food!
Got to see awesome family.
And I'm satiated... with life. With love. With coming home late and finding myself greeted like a rockstar by 3 puppymonsters who don't give me 101 questions... just love and gladness that I'm home.

And I can receed into my own space. Blissed in knowing that love still exists.

Thank you Ouma... for just being amazing.
Thank you for my dad... for my 19 cousins... for the 14/15 second cousins... for being the woman that sits at the head of our family table with so much love and compassion and forgiveness. I hope to one day be like you in these things.
Kind, without wanting.
Loving, without a score card.
Forgiving, with no check board.

I wish, however, that I could say I was back in the COMFORT of my new home... but I'm drowing in boxes right now that should be unpacked so that I can go to Lydenburg in some kind of peace on the 2nd of January. Sigh

Store Updates: Wonder Struck Inc.

Now... before I fall asleep at my desk.

Blessed be humans. Whoever and whereever you are.

It's here...somewhere...probably

Ergh... 7 days into the move!... yes... 7 days.
HOW DID I HAVE SO MUCH STUFF?!

Sigh.

My tiny new home is filled with boxes and it's not even the end.
Last night was my first night sleeping here, with the 3 musketeer monsters protecting me from any strangeness in our new home.
Wagener is currently rolling about with invisible ninja's in a pile of rags in the living room. Apollo is also in the living room, snoring as he lays on the cold tiles, trying to find relief from a full stomach and a hot rainy evening. And Astraeus monster has had a temporary matress/bed made at my feet in the work room so he can come chew his toys and keep me jealously to himself from the other two. He's been snarling and barking at anything that comes near to me... or looks at me. Sigh

They also spent their first official day, mostly alone at home as I headed to Pretoria to spend time with the family.
A huge lunch was had... one that I'm STILL full from at nearly 9pm! but it was good...and that diabetics safe chocolate mousse that my landladies made for the dessert was divine. (my aunts own the house I'm renting... if the landladies thing is confusing).

Tomorrow the last lot of curtains get put up, I'm going to try and finish bringing the last of all my stuff from the parentals... including the second work space desk.

Things that have happened since "officially" moving in last night...
3 lightbulbs blew.
my 5 year old kettle packed up after putting it on...ONCE.

What I've learnt in one day...
Coffee isn't that bad without milk when you REALLY need that caffiene kick at 6:30am while 3 puppymonsters are pestering you to let them out for morning garden prowlings.
I have missed living on my own ... "own", more than I could have realised.
I have 3 of the most special boys in my life that will be sharing my home with me.

Now. Go forth and have a fantastic remainder of this Christmas day.
Blessed be.

P.S Even though our Etsy store is closed, it'd be GREAT if you could go promote/like/support our fundraising campaign! ~ Wonder Struck Inc. store funding campaign

Thankful... satiated...

between "re-watching" all of the old Naruto... I've spent the last 5 days moving into the new house and tomorrow I will officially have the very last bit of anything I own, in a tiny little house, 3km's from here.

And besides that good news? ... getting 2 emails in quick succession, informing me that Heatherlyn and I have received donations to our start up project!
Yup, we're at 4% of target only 2 days into the 90 day target.
88 days left and it'd be GREAT if we could make AT LEAST 50% of target... actually we *have* to make at least 50% of the target in order to get ANY funding.

So... do us a favour and go support our project any way you can, spread the word, like the project, give us R2 (or more) ;)
everything positive will be appreciated and if I know who you are, I'll probably even send you a personal message to thank you. Our 2 backers already have theirs waiting to be read.

... no matter how small the good deed, it should be met with the greatest of wholehearted gratitude.

~ CJ ~

Baby steps...

Well, if you don't read my store's blog...

>.< The funding project for Wonder Struck has officially been created.

There's a bit of work that goes into investing in our project via that site, where you'd have to sign up and buy investment credits.
But we'd REALLY appreciate the time you take for this, and just sharing the project via the "share buttons" all over the page would be appreciated too.

Go onto Wonder Struck's blog if you need more details about the project... Wonder Struck Inc.

Thanks!

Calming centre... and puppies at your feet

As I pack things for the move into the car, I'm surrounded by the hot, clear skied sunshine of mid-Summer here in the Vaal.
I also have to skip and hop with boxes in my arms as I dodge puppy monsters trying their best to twist eachother around my ankles.

This is the life... at least its the one I want so earnestly.
Peaceful. Simple.
I really am going to relish the 3 and half weeks I have left of leave... I just wish the life I find myself surrounded by in this time, could stretch onward to become the norm.
Sigh.

The biggest part of the move (in my opinion) happened yesterday. All the biggest furniture is now at the new house.
Today its boxes of crockery, linens, art and Wonder Struck Inc. components that are being sent up to the new place in excitement for the new stretch... ready to take on 2013 with another level of positivity I never knew that *I* was able to have.

2 days ago I quickly dropped off the Christmas gifts with the ladies, and they hopefully were completely honest on how much they liked their gifts.
A beautiful woodgrain salad bowl for the chef, and a pewter tool kit for the crafty.
They also drove with me to come see the shell of the new home (before anything was in it) and the chef was already telling me how I should do my garden ;) what a farm girl!
I then spent some time watching The Brave with them at their place, before coming back to the reality that was the packing process.

To be honest... only about 30% of what needs to still be moved is in boxes....closed *moving* boxes.
Sigh
I know I'll get around to the rest today... hopefully. But there's a lingering of being away from the parental unit...as the stepmom and I jest about "wanting our space" and "buggaring off" and "thankful to be rid of"...
Who ever doesn't have a sense of humour would think I have the worst relationship with them...
When I was near being destitute and irreparably broke...my parents took me in again. They helped me get back on my feet and... dare I say that my understanding and relationship with them has improved tenfold since being with them for that time.
But... as much as I love them, to be in my own home AGAIN will be exhilarating. And the SPACE!

Ok... so back to work then. Packing and driving is in store for today.

Have the greatest of Thursdays humans!

Live love laugh

Not sure where...

I have no idea where the sudden flipout of inspiration has come from with the making... but its here and its in charge!

I hope all the creatives have an inspiring week ahead!

You guys!...

I have realised just how hard it is for me to NOT appreciate the people in my life right now.

I haven't seen them in a couple of weeks, but what was going to be a celebration of all of us ending work on the same day, ended up with me and this crazy chick celebration my 4 weeks of leave, her new job ventures and.... game farm guy still having another week of work added onto his life.

We had such a fantastic evening though.
A loud ruckus dinner at Spur moved to a lang arm dance excursion at the Barnyard in Vereeniging.
No... I didn't dance. But I watched with great amusement as game farm guy exhausted himself dancing with his rather sloshed girlfriend, who wasn't in the least bit phased.

I was also getting shelf by shelf photo updates from the girls in Henley as they were working on the work room at their house last night.
To think that as unimportant as this activity might be... to just be included in it when I'm not even there. Sigh

I really do have the most amazing human beings in my life.
The happiness they plant in my just wants to burst at their awesome. eeeeeeyyaaaaaaaaa!

To Everyone I have met/known/know/love/like/lost, I hope you're going into an amazing Christmas/Holiday season and that it'll fill you with so much happiness.
You're all amazing.

~CJ~

did i mention....

I've recently only discovered this band. I am just loving Taylor Momsen's voice and I don't care who knows...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjSyG6qksOo

And *this* song's chorus just makes me so happy...thanks Biffy Clyro

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxUb9Yzr1sE

Here's an old favourite of mine as well... from Rise Against (FYI no other song has the playcount that this song does on my winamp)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8X3ACToii0


SIGH.... midnight music cravings.......

Toodles bitches.

Being Grateful...

Sigh... as the year closes there are things that have come to light and are seeing closure.

For one, my ex-stable landlord and I have seen the end to the lies, stories and admittedly, an end to the pity that I've at least been having over the last few weeks for a girl in her early/mid twenties that has had to start her life over again.
My ex-stable mate has found a new stable yard where she is moving/has moved her boy Turkish to and I can only hope the best for her as she takes on lessons and training again. I'm also hoping that she takes her new slate as an opportunity to close the gap between her and her sister.
My ex-stable landlord and her husband are about to set off for a new residence (we hope) in the next month and after all she's done for me and my two boys this year, I hope the coast brings about new peace for her.

It's also almost annual shutdown.
The time of year that I think everyone in my industry counts down to.
It's been hard for us.
And the politics and deceit have been rife between competitors and colleagues alike.
Almost time to close our eyes and just breathe out a sigh of relief!
I think all of us are hoping that next year is better for the industry, ours in particular.

Also... to healing hearts.
A few weeks ago, I lost my gorgeous Loupa, who had been with us for almost 3 years. I know there is no replacement for her. There will always be this space where she's supposed to be and where we want her to be...
To the new addition to our pack, Wagener, who with my other boys, lights up the end of every day for me.

Now... to sign off, I have black cherries to eat and rooibos tea to drink.
I'm also in the middle of this hectic game of Zoo Tycoon 2 >.<

Hey! ...

As much as I have been fond over my little well used notebook... wow does it feel great to work on a bigger and faster machine!
Every time I type it feels like I should sigh in bliss.

I cannot believe... CANNOT believe how fast the progress on my new home is coming on.
The aunts are like boulders right now, just move out the way until they're done or they'll crush you in the wake of their mission.
What started as a 5 point basic list has turned into the massive remodel.
I was only looking for a carport, working light fittings, taps and shower head in the bathroom and... a fenced yard.
I now have a carport, balcony/mini lapa, new bathroom plumbing in the shower, new wiring, and a huge section of yard being fenced.
We're also too scared to mention that the oven doesn't work... just now a new section of work begins on that too.
So... hopefully the work will be pretty much done by this weekend and I'll be moving in before Christmas probably. Could be fun!

I'm counting down the days to annual shutdown at work too.
Things in most industries might have been tough this year, but I can only speak for my industry. And this year has just been awful for us.
I don't know how the people at my work feel, but I could do with a months seperation from our line of work. Sigh

Other things have happened too this year... that we're better off without. Broken hearts, financial stress, work stress, dogs at vets, long days at markets, deception, and just overall horribleness.

I have to, however, mention that... no one could be more thankful than I for:
amazing parents
fantastic and very real friends
puppies who love me so unconditionally
horses and ponies that just make me happy to have them
and having a job!

Now... before I get  too little sleep for the 5th last day of work for 2012, have a great eve humans.

In a can...

I am really counting down the days till annual shutdown.
I feel like this year has just been so exhausting for everyone... for some exhausting good, and others, exhausting bad...

But all in need of some rest, no doubt.

In between making new stock for my markets, I'm modifying a neon pink wig for this Saturday's market.
I'm going as a faery!
Though... I'm battling to find a dress :( which could be a major glitch to my outfit :(

at least the wings and wig are bought. and Heatherlynn already has her FULL outfit. WHY ME?!

I'm also on the edge of my seat about my SARS issues. Documents were scanned and sent through last night, so I'm waiting... almost with baited breath.... to find out the outcome of their assessment.
Hold thumbs that I don't owe them anything >.<

taken on this day 2 years ago... this is the tree our town sets up every year. PRETTY!

when there's no space between the lines...

November... 2008. I was living in Parkhurst (one of those uber trendy little suburbs near Joburg).
I had a tiny 2 bedroom house/cottage which I shared between a house mate and my brother. Two people that I entrusted my life to, without even realising just how much.

When I sit here at this notebook, staring at this startling white screen, and I look back at who that person was... I remember someone so different.
Someone who felt lost (she was). Who felt like the world was out to get her (it wasn't).

Things have changed over these few years... changes that I may have been guided to... but that I *had* to take with my own two hands and do. MYSELF.
Yea........ smooth sailing isn't how I'd describe the journey to now.
I've still got freshly scraped knees to remind me how I'm constantly working at getting back onto my own feet and learning to walk over the little bumps.
And I see all my previous disillusionment in many of those around me... but by now, the 29th of November 2012, I've also learnt that my time is sometimes best left to self evaluation, rather than pointing at others.
Yea... I'll give advice if I've made it past that obstacle successfully enough to help someone get over the initial part. The rest... we've all got to figure out for ourselves.
For those who've known my brash past self, are still loosely footed as to how to accept/notice/take on the changes.
That's ok. I'm not here for your validation or for you to say "oh yes, you've changed. congrads". *tactless but honest*
I'll tell you what is and what isn't about me. Done.

But... there is one thing I have personally learnt to be the biggest of all mistakes... A S S U M P T I O N.
I'm at that place where I'll tell you my thoughts/feelings... if its relevant that you know.
Negative... or positive ;)

I'm still learning about not jumping to HUGE conclusions... I usually get there by some certainty first.
If I get there at all.

I'm learning all over again to like people. REALLY REALLY like people. They are who they are, just as surely as I won't change to please others, not even just for the sake of their company.
And those that I love? ... I will unabashedly and desperately wish for the best for them.
I wish them to want/need/love/have/live.... to have ambition, to fight for a quality life, to experience every small detail of bliss... and to never lose those that they love, to never be far from those that they can lean on.
Isn't that what every parent wishes for their child? isn't that what every lover wishes for their partner? isn't that what every child wishes for their grandparents?
we're this circle of existence in eachothers space... and when you jump off that cliff, arms spread wide and a smile on your face... they're the ones that will catch you. WITHOUT A DOUBT.

Live...

End of year disbliss...

Sigh

I got home on Friday, in this flat panic... mainly because I hadn't filed my tax and the deadline was midnight on Friday.
I *usually* have my tax in and submitted within the first few weeks that it becomes available to file... and this year.
Yea... this year hasn't worked out that way. I lost my IRP5, which I since requested from our accountant who still hasn't sent a copy to me and ... AND... my tax return was flagged because of a difference to me working out on my salary slips to what our accountant handed in (and apparently doesn't have a copy at hand to pass on to me)
GAH

The worst is.. that if I'm wrong, I owe the revenue guys almost 2 grand. If I'm right... they owe ME almost 8grand.
I want to be right!

.... then apart from me being in luck and having no end to money at this time of year, apparently (wish I had gotten the memo sooner kinda thing), I'm left wondering that inbetween having these beautiful friends that I can disappear into a Sunday afternoon with.. I also have these flashes of hurt and knife-in-the-heart moments from those people that will mean the world to me no matter what (blood is thicker than water).
So being the shoulder to cry on for distraught girl buddies, eating lunch with amazing craft market parents (my parents away from home really), I really do STILL feel like *I* need a shoulder to cry on.
Sigh.
I can't help but feel hurt... and after tearing up several times today over this particular incident, a friend messaged me with "so what if you're hurt. EMBRACE IT."
Yes. I have every right to be hurt... I'm really working so desperately hard at becoming a better person, becoming the person they can rely on... and they just kick my heart in the face AGAIN.
Yea. I have EVERY. RIGHT. TO. BE. HURT.
It means I still love them, hugely and desperately. And I guess THAT part is good.
And so I embrace this feeling of hurt and anger. I'll work my way through it to the other side, and maybe this WANT of wanting to be happy about the news, will develop... eventually.

That saturates me... that mix of actual sadness and the deep want for happiness. and it all comes out in a puppy of 8ish weeks that is learning to give paw!
That has been my crowning achievement for today, with 3 weeks to go till annual shutdown and customers trying really hard not to kick me out of their workshops so that they can just get their work done... I taught my new little boy how to paw and it felt like I was worth giving air to again.

... if you follow my store's blog... you're going to open it to a mass of last minute lists of markets I'm trying to get into before closing end of the year.
With talks of a night market this Friday night, a market on Saturday, and the Midsummer Night's dream market NEXT Saturday... and there's others inbetween for this Sunday and maybe next Sunday and and and... I don't know how we're going to get to it all!
I'll keep you in the loop as we go (grin).

Now... off to a hot shower, more making and a pre-sleep coffee, and being alone with my sore heart and my busy mind.

~Love~

Adrenaline... who needs it?

In all the years I've been working... as internal sales, bookkeeper, assistant, database administrator, sales rep... this is the FIRST time EVER I've had my tax unfiled.... 4 days till the deadline... well 3 days, considering it's 10pm.

AHHHHHH!

I really *don't* have that kind of money to pay back to the tax man either, considering how much already gets deducted off of my salary to tax alone every month... REALLY?!

As I had my head  buried in stress in my personal files looking for forms and paperwork, my diligent stepmom has been as the calculator, staring at my tax forms online.
Sigh.
"We can always submit until you get the paperwork, and appeal later."
I've never been stressed about this kind of thing... thanks SARS for the adrenaline rush.

Now... I'd like some coffee, rusks and a stern talking to myself about how little money I'm going to have over the holidays because of how much is already being given out... and I haven't even gotten paid yet.
Sigh

It's ok.
It could be worse.
yes... it defenitely could and I'd rather not imagine HOW.

Nooooo......

man. I got all into this anime that I "discovered".... even though it's been out since 2008.
It's only 25 episodes...

I got all excited about how it was going to end... well. it "ended".
HOW DO YOU END IT LIKE *THAT* ?

I'm so disappointed now.
The kind of disappointed that you see in American movies, where they whip this tub of icecream out of their freezers and dig into it with a spoon.
Gah.

To counter this sadness... I will watch Nichijou (My ordinary life) and make more stuff......
If anyone has watched My Ordinary Life... you'll understand. *nod*

The Thoughtfuls...

Found some very random shots I took in the last few months... I like the sky.

Not everything is all serious...

Ah well... every now and again I have to take a break from watching my EXTREME collection of anime while working on jewellery... and click open the ol' winamp.

I'm not as obsessive with my last.fm page, quite to the extent that I am with my twitter... but when I get the time, scouring last.fm for artists and music info is just so satisfying.
It also leads to much happiness after a few minutes of page searches, when I realise that, as metalheads, we don't always take ourselves too seriously.
Because really, have you seen some of these band pictures?
I believe less and less that metalheads are the knive/sword wielding, gun-toting world/people haters that "other people" make us out to be when things go wrong with some kid's mind and he/she goes and kills a few classmates at school.
You may be over sensitive about the subject, but I'm over sensitive on the other side of that fence.
We're nice people... if you bothered to look past your prejudice and see the bunch of clowns that get to laugh at themselves and eachother and just generally take part in jovial matters at the local gigspot.

As extensive as my music collection has become in recent years, I was almost bowled over by only recently (today) discovering a song featuring one of my all time favourite artist's, Skin (vocalist of Skunk Anansie).
Tony Iommi's track "Meat" ..... how did I only find this song NOW?! (considering this album of Iommi's was released in 2000 *cough* )
If you haven't come across this track yet, well, open up your browsers and go get up on this song.
The combination of artistry in this song is just so amazing...

I've also recently gotten myself some "The Pretty Reckless", fronted by blonde "have it all" girl, Taylor Momsen. This girl has such an awesome voice on her!
Loving the their addition to my music collection.

Also... those who don't have me on whatsapp or gtalk... don't know how CRAZY I've been going over Maylene and the Sons of disaster..... if you have me on twitter you'll know how mad I've been over Norma Jean's Meridional album.

Oh music!

...then.. different subject (welcome to how my mind works)
Finally getting somewhere with my whole endeavour to do proofreading and copywriting work. Made progress today AND pretty little Maruchka is designing my Etsy store banner for my typography store:
The Quotable Zoo (see what I did there? ;) )

All in all, I've survived this week far better than last week.
And its 6 weeks and counting to our annual shutdown at work... then I'll have a whole 4 weeks off of work!
Gah.
It almost can't get here quick enough.

Days to breathe...

Taking a day off of work still feels odd to me...even with all the arrangements made and the thumbs up given... I still feel like a naughty school child, bunking class.

And then that feeling dissipates when I see the puppymonster pack lazing outside in a windy overcast morning and I see the pile of orders that still need to be packed, because I *was* planning on getting to the post office early to send them all off.
O.o
yea...

I *had* great plans for today... lets see if I can keep to them.

Day jobs aren't all...

So for almost 2 years I've known this really awesome set of human beings... Heatherlynn and her son, Wes.
I got to know them at a monthly craft market (which we both still attend), and at all our markets during these 2 years, we've been stall neighbours... and this one coming up in December is no different.

Come support us!

Zen? ...

Well... October may be filled with blossoming trees and green grass and rain...
but it's also been filled with 2 and a half weeks of the worst atmosphere at work.
With impending retrenchments, mine being one of them up for consideration, I find myself with no footing.

I have no idea what to expect in the days coming up, or even after that, and though I've hated not having control in situations I SHOULD have control in... I think I'm going to learn how to "let go" even more as we take the next few steps forward.

It would be nice though to have some warning...

In the MEANTIME... I'm watching anime (finally got all the episodes of History's Strongest Disciple), trying to clean up the mess of craftery that fills my space and of course... spending time with some of the most amazing humans that just fill me with so much happiness.

As I sit here... I just get the feeling that as humans, we're too easily shaken by things that could very well be taken in stride.
Hold onto your goals tightly and don't let anything allow you to waver.

We'll get there... eventually.

Pictures...and memories

Some photo's that I've found....forgotten... *sigh*

Dysfunction...and functioning

The last few weeks have left me realising that, there'll always be a continuous swirl about you, trying to make things far more complicated than necessary.

Never lose sight of what you want and never allow complications to become greedy monsters of your time...
Whether it be 58 year old suicidal depressives, 20-something pathilogical liars or just car washers that can't seem to get around to washing your car in the queue...

Life needs to be about quality...not quantity.
Being a millionaire will not give you simplicity and abundance...

I do not regret a single lesson I have learned these last few weeks...I will dust off my knees and smile...before taking my next step towards my nearest goal.

My day's soundtrack: Monoloog in Stereo by Fokofpolisiekar.

Get your life ;)

Creativity...

I'm having another late Saturday night... and we're not even in the last hours before a market!

I'm struck by inspiration...or that's how it feels at least. Gah!
It's probably just because of this rain... oh the beautiful storm that errupted this evening *sigh*

I made a whole stack of new bracelets today and a new necklace, roughly based on 3 of the necklaces I made for last week's Medieval market...though I know I'm getting more to the point of  "skrew the rest of the world! I want to and WILL make the stuff I want to wear and that my friends would wear."
I'm fully aware of consequences that would come from this outlook, but I'm also aware of how full my current workspace is with stuff ! ...and yes, USELESS stuff... sigh

So, inbetween making new and inspired stock, I'm going to try and clean out this flood of components that's threatening to end my life with claustrophobia...

I'm also nervously starting to put together ideas and layouts for my newest store on Etsy where I can put out something useful for all the stationary I collect and the typography I do... and I'll find uses for all my cool little fonts that I've been collecting... again.
The Quotable Zoo will be a mass of quotes from history, songs, and other places in printed form and soon after, on useful home and wearable things. Bonus is that there'll be minimum space required for the preprinted stuff.... AND NO COMPONENTS NEEDED!
sigh

Fuelled on coffee (yummers), j-rock (High and Mighty Color leading the charge), and a mass of thoughts boiling in my brain... I go forth to get this workspace sorted out a bit more...so that I at least have space to crash when I can no longer stay awake O.o

Windy evening posts...

It's great knowing that Spring is here... the orchard at the stables is starting to get all green and the flowers have fallen off all the trees... soon we'll be picking peaches for breakfast!

But anyway...
the wind has been going crazy since this afternoon, and I can't wait for it to bring rain along with it.
I also cannot wait to get some real sleep this weekend.
I have been on a sleep diet this week... isn't there something about neuro receptors and lack of sleep?
I base this knowledge on Big Bang Theory...
Yes, if I can *just* clock in at least 7 hours tonight... I'll be blissed.

But I have one last cup of coffee to finish before any sleeping happens.
Waste not, want not...

Tomorrow, I'll be tackling some of this lack of space I'm suffering from. Especially since its been concluded that I won't be moving into my new place till probably beginning December.
...yes...that IS two and half months away.
as if the urgency to be free of this claustrophobia wasn't at enough of a peak...
but we'll get there, and it'll all be worth the wait!

*screeeeeeech*

Sometimes I need to believe it...

Found on the internet: ...

Continued education...

Though late in the year, my stepmom and I have proven that it's never too late to start that dreaded "This year I will..." list.

My step-mother's taken up teaching herself how to play piano (on my ancient battery operated keyboard) and I have, quite successfully, been learning how to write the uncial alphabet (calligraphy).
I've also been doing research on using my sparetime for proofreading... this continues.

Next is writing my learners for a bike license...again.
This is in an effort to get a little vintage style scooter to ride around my little town on.
I kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
Firstly, NO ONE will ever ask me for a lift while I'm using it.
Secondly, I will be going "green" and saving on LITRES of fuel that I would otherwise be using in my car.
Great, right?

I'm slowly endeavoring to get back in the saddle and ride before my Sonny is too far over the hills to ride ever again, but this endeavor involves me shedding much unneeded weight. And it's happening... slowly but surely.

I truly do believe that continued education (even self-education) should never be shunned or disregarded.

  

To believe... in luck.

Over the last 3 months, and even more so over the last 2 weeks, my friend has become a believer in "luck".
Most of it bad.

And today, is a day I should have called off and spent in bed... mostly because, my awesome HTC Flyer tablet was stolen. Right out of my bag, without me noticing, obviously though, until it was long over.
* sigh *

Then... *snort* John's wallet got stolen.
We are no where near eachother in kilometres today, but how odd!

Oh well. These are just things... things that can at some stage be replaced, I suppose. 
So the dissappointment will be short lived.
Thank goodness.

But other than that!
Though my spelling and grammar, has at times, been downright atrocious... I have this *thing* for correcting people. Until it was recently pointed out to me that I should direct my "grammer and spelling Hitler" skills into something more constructive. Ie. That I could get paid to do.
;)
Not a profession I would have considered, until recently, but one I'm heading into slowly.
Proofreading and copyediting!

This, could be a journey! 

Changes... Like seasons?

I've been spending a rather ridiculous amount of time reflecting on the last 10 - 12 years of my life.
Just things I could have done so differently, and how awful I used to be... And may very well still be.
But I admit, these last three (or so) years, have probably been the best thing to happen to me.
Honest.
Decision upon logical/practical decision keeps being made. As I go forth, sticking to my guns and keeping my word and just generally persevering... I find myself slowly finding balance.
Though... A few weeks ago I was treading water, slipping up, feeling lost and overwhelmed... I made it through alive!
I'm smiling again and spending more time reconnecting with very beautiful people in my life... I'm trying hard to stop the procrastination that I seem to continually suffer from... But that's for another venting blog post.
I may have found something I can honestly sink my teeth into. And with confidence! The self-doubt seems to be so insignificant in comparison to how sure I am.
All might be revealed soon. I'm in no rush though... :P

I've been Sherlocked

It's about the 3rd time that I'get worked my way through this "new" Sherlock series.

I'm somewhat infatuated with oddities. Go figure.

Sunshine bringer onner...

1st day of August...meaning (to me at least) that Spring is a month away.
Gah! I cannot wait.

In the meantime I still get to wrap on just about every scarf I own...sometimes at once.
It's. Also come to my attention that my glove collection is far too few for the long winter...this will be rectified before the next season, no doubt.

I'm at this time, however, itching more to move into my new home.
If any of my friends read this... I'll be listing my "wants" for the upcoming housewarming shinanigans.
Be warned.

Also...if I haven't already broken the horrible news. I've given in to the hipsters and added myself onto Instagram: zoocatty
Add/follow me for a mass of picture adding that will doubtfully enrich your life. At. All.

Weary Saturday nights...

What a day of the oddest sales...
I'm physically fragile and bet a coffee would ease the stiff and old about now...

Happy post-birthday day to my gorgeous friend, Heatherlynn, and had great fun with Astra and Jane today. It's pretty cool knowing so many awesome people.

Shew.

Hurt.all.over

Ergh
Seriously experiencing some stiffness these last few weeks...so much for this "getting fit" malarky.

The horsebeast has finally started settling into his place at the new stables...but whether I'm settling is a different story...
Morning and evening stable duties and getting horses ready for a 5th of August show...battling so hard to find balance.

But in the meantime...onward!

The things that take up time...

The new ponybeast arrived this last week.
A frightful, nervous that ninjas are in EVERYTHING, can't eat out of bowls, wire haired 2 year old Welshie cross baby, Leroy.

Here we go...

Not sure how I feel about Mondays anymore...

Its only just after midday and the fact that I'm not a shriveling pile of tears...is a pure miracle. For sure.

Other than that... yea.
9 deg. C.
Clear blue skies.
I'm travelling around Edenvale... the place I lived for 2 years of my life, where I met some of the most amazing people that I'm still lucky to be in contact with...
And even though Opeth's "Hope Leaves" is playing in my car, I'm blissed at the familiar feeling this town always gives me.
Sigh

I do however wish I was at the stables right now, blissing away my "monday miserabilies" with the horses around me.

But back to working for my salary.

 

Chilly weekends...

Been trying to keep warm this weekend with my favourite indoor activities... like watching anime...and downloading anime.

You know... the deep intellegent stuff.

Otherwise, any evidence of productivity in any shape or form from this weekend is probably only evident on Etsy, and at the stables where we've been spending just about any spare time.

Sigh

Geekout...

For *weeks* I've been *craving* the Transformer movies...

Tonight I'm watching all 3, in sequence.
Gah!

After having a really hard busy day, with feed co-ops, cleaning stables, exercising horses... my cold, sore self is parked on a couch and watching so much geeky goodness I could explode from the awesome.

Team Autobot!

Admiration...

I know I should probably these type of blog entries on the other blog...but I also have a deep facination for this self sufficient chick, and I wanted to share her work that badly:

Lunaricsales on Etsy and Twitter

Here are just some of the pieces I recently purchased from her store:

Also... I oogled over this Marionette for MONTHS.. it has since sold, but still worth sharing:

by Mporter on Etsy

So yes... relevant to me because they're MY Etsy indulgences... at least for my eyes.

*sigh*

Words live ...

I'm a metalhead.
I live in and am proud of this culture, with its high tolerance, forgiveness and general awesomeness... yes. Our culture is more layered and deeper than that, but that's for another blog.
I love the music I do because of its honesty, intellegence and the self reflection of it...

I don't listen to radio, other than for traffic reports, before switching right back to my homemade playlist.
The playlist currently on my flashdrive was rather "rush made", but there are true musical gems that I somehow remembered were important enough to have on here.
One of those songs kicked me in the gutts this morning and left me with calm and serenity...

Aerials by System of A Down.

The opening words MUST haunt you constantly if you are trying to make a better person of yourself:

Life is like a waterfall
We're one in the river
And one again after the fall...

I've had to work harder than I have in months to fight off the urge to use guilt trips on people.
This week I've also had to work even harder at being considerate and patient towards other human beings.

Other people may treat you like trash...but that's no excuse to allow yourself to become like them.

...this is a rather serious post for me to write...but fire and brimstone preachings can be therapeutic.

Now...onward to Friday and smiles.

Lingerings...

Three years ago, coming into the murky gutts of Joburg Central made me wince in disdain...
All the cars, taxis, noise, humans, buildings...
Most of that disdain and fear most South African's hold for this "once upon a time" great city....dissipated.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not about to carry my handbag casually on my arm and walk 6 blocks alone. But, I guess my eyes are just more open to the colour, diversity....life that this cemented estate holds.
Condemned buildings built in 1889 with their boarded windows and doors, between newer, more modern high rises...the contrast between old and new is starkest in the older parts of this metropolis.
At least half a dozen different cultures culminate on a stretch of shops lining busy streets, while below this city are underground parking lots, filled to capacity by cars driven by the enormous workforce that floods this city 24hours a day, 7 days a week.
As I drive through the busy streets, calling on customers, I pass street vendors trying to make a living, guys dancing to the music playing in their earphones, people sitting in the winter sun on sidewalks warming themselves before heading back into the old cold buildings they work in...

Students wearing the latest fashion, old men dressed in their 70's best to go draw their wages at the banks, women laughing and chatting as they wait for busses and taxis.
And inbetween all these oddly matched buildings lined up at eachothers sides....the sky rises above all this concrete and asphalt, clear and blue.

Sigh.

Parts of my life...

Not alot of people get my reference to "puppymonsters"...and its ok if you don't, but if you do...here are 2 of my 4 puppymonsters, my madness, my heartattack givers, my cuddlers and snugglers, my soulmates...
Left: Apollo (7 year old Labrodor X great dane) aka. Puppyfats/Fatty
Right: Loupa (2 year old Alsation X Boerboel) aka. Lionwolf/wolfylion/lion/girly/eater of feet/destructo

Satiated...but temporarily

As much as I was making stock for Wonder Struck.... I did nothing else.
My pj's and slippers became my most intimate of companions this weekend as I binged on coffee, sunrises, sunsets and puppymonster cuddles.
I also went through at least 3 episodes of Game of Thrones...... ahem.

Then Monday arrived and its been a mad mess of busy.

I also ended up writing a bio of myself for a craft interview on another Etsy crafter's blog. I haven't sent it to her yet... but as different as many of us are on Etsy...I think 99% of us aspire to become those crafters that make a living from the things we love creating.
Oh but to give up this rat race and craft all day........le sigh.

A girl can but dream!

Squander indeed...

Its taken many years for me to rectify my life...and to take responsibilty for my own part in it all...
However, in this song, I find so much relevance outside of me.

Squander - Skunk Anansie

Why take everything you see?
You have nothing left to squander
If you keep pushing me away
You have no one left to love
You throw it all away
Those ties you went and suffered for
you called disaster
squander squander squander squander
Why take everything you see?
You have nothing left to squander
If you keep pushing me away
You have no one left to do love
you're less than you should be
what runs so hard to finish I
you could contendement
squander squander squander squander
Why take everything you see?
You have nothing left to squander
If you keep pushing me away
You have no one left to looooove, looooove
Why squander squander squander squander
Why take everything you see?
You have nothing left to squander
If you keep pushing me away
You have no one left to, no one left to love

*play it for someone dear and wayward in your life*

False sense...

Ah... what a way to kick off Saturday (a day that I look forward to with such enthusiasm).
My good vibe want was all for nought when I got into my horse's stable this morning...and was greeted by destruction.
His blanket buckles were half undone (which originally thought was by some unseen force), a haynet was on the ground and.... his saddle was gone.
Yup. That's when it hit me that... as my beautiful little blondie barked her lungs out the previous night, at 7:30pm, it was indeed over someone helping themselves to my saddle and attemptingly to my horse. They got one half of the thievery right.

I was rather surprised to find that, though I believe we should report all "out of the ordinary" acts to the cops, I didn't expect our local police station to not only send one car out less than half an hour after my call.... but TWO cars.
The policemen were all very nice about being called out over a small saddle, but took the matter rather seriously...maybe because during the course of last night there was alot of shinanigans happening in and around the neighbourhood apart from a thief in my stable...
Thankfully, dogs weren't poisoned and horses weren't successfully stolen, though that doesn't mean I'm not sitting here at my desk at 1am being paranoid over the possibility of someone being by my horse right now, despite the silence from the puppy monsters.

Absolutely ridiculous though, right?

...right?

Photo editing binge...

More fun with my photo editing app.

Just to blow your minds on a Friday...

Eloff Street....

Eloff Street, Joburg Central.
On a winter Thursday morning...

I have...

I have found the raddest photo app for my delicious android phone...

Its part of my new bout of Happy